Why Solo Trips are Not My Cup of Tea

There was a time when I was crazy about solo road trips, and then I got bored of them!

Yes, I got bored of something that drives the entire world mad. On my first road trip to the hills of Himachal Pradesh, I had a lot of fun on my own. It was pleasant living in a hostel for the first time. The dorms of the room appealed me so much that I wanted to live there forever. However, I met two girls in the dorm who were staying in the same room on the same bed for six months. It was too difficult to visualize a life where you have only one bed and a small cupboard that can accommodate only a few clothes. I used to live in a paying guest accommodation at that time, and even a small closet would appear too petite to me. I wonder how these girls were managing without proper arrangement for their clothes and other stuff. I dropped the idea of staying for too long in a hostel! My PG was better than that.

Then again, after a 2-3 more solo trips, I realized that I cannot travel like this forever. It becomes too boring at times to be in a new city and not be able to share my experiences with anyone. Yes, I can make new friends at all times, or that is what I always thought about solo travelers. However, I realized that even after being an extrovert person, I can only make good acquaintances, not friends. I don’t trust people easily and I don’t reveal too much about myself to anyone unless I am too sure about the person. I did meet many people like me who would like to share a meal with me, or talk to me for a few minutes, but the conversation would become too boring to continue after a while. That is when I would start missing my friends with whom I could talk my heart out.

Cost is also an important factor when it comes to enjoying a luxurious trip. When I have to decide the mode of transportation, for example, I have to choose the public transport since I cannot afford to hire a Self-Drive Car on rent Delhi as it would burn a hole in my pocket. I have to be with a group of 3-4 people to share the costs of expensive activities so that we all can share the burden. There is no scope of sharing the expenses with anyone when I am all alone on a road trip.

Getting bored is also something that kills me. Although I have my books with me whenever I travel, I still look forward to talking to someone. Reading cannot provide the inner satisfaction at all times; I do need someone to crack jokes and gossip about people when I am out of the city. Nonetheless, after being to so many solo and group road trips, I would prefer to travel with a group of people.

My Idea of Solo Trips in India

Some things are beyond your control, and so is my urge for solitude. I do like to be with my family and friends, but I cannot ignore the compulsive need to spend time with myself every few months. This may not make me a real solo traveler as other people are around the world, but I love intermittent solitude every once in a while.

Trip to the mountains

If my love for mountains could be put in words, I would do that here, but I cannot. On my last trip to Kasol, I had very high expectations of the place, but that place was too much crowded with people. There were hundreds of folks wandering around, which made me felt even more claustrophobic than Delhi. I so wanted to leave that place and reach a quiet one that I just spent one night there. I left for Tosh the next morning and had a great time in the camp. Then, I went for trekking the next day, which was a really challenging experience. Although the mountains of Kheerganga trek intimidated me at that time, my heart still goes to that place whenever I think about it. The plush green forests were so breathtaking, even though tough to hike, that I wanted to click a picture at every few meters. I have been to several other mountain treks with friends and a few of them alone, which makes me confidently say that I love the hills of North India.

Trip to the beaches

I had heard it somewhere that mountain-lovers do not love the beaches, and it is absolutely true in my case. I like the beaches, but my love for them is a little lesser than the hills. Thankfully, I have never been to any beach site alone. There were people with me whenever I had a plan to go to a beach city, whether it was in India or abroad. I don’t know why, but beaches do not give me that peace that I receive from the mountains. I can enjoy my solitary time only for a while at such places. After that, I need someone to talk to, be it anyone.

Trip in the city

I have never met anyone who likes to walk around the city alone, but myself. I like to explore the new streets and cafes of Delhi, the religious shrines around the city, and the roadside restaurants as well. I hired Self-Drive Car Rental in Delhi last month and just drove to random streets wherever I felt like. It was an amazing day-out, which is unexplainable. I have been to various libraries, museums, and parks just for the sake of being in silence for a day. It gives immense gratification that I cannot elaborate in words.

A solo traveler, according to me, is not just the one who leaves footprints around the world, but the one who can enjoy silence in the mind and heart even while being among the people.

How I Deal with Difficult People While Traveling Solo

Even though I am an urban Indian female, the challenges of traveling solo are no less for me. I have been lucky to live in Delhi for most part of my life, but I have seen the small town life as well. The narrow minded perspective of the North Indian society makes it challenging for women to travel alone, no matter the distance. With a significant number of experience at hand, I have learned that there I no way I can teach the right way to behave to some people, regardless the gender. There are men, as well as, women who do not know that they need to conduct themselves carefully in public places. However, I know how I should give them a piece of my mind to warn them immediately.

Dealing with men  

Luckily, there are men in my home who are very polite and understanding. I have been to several road trips with them, and we had a blast every time. Yet, when I had to travel alone for the first time, my choice was Rishikesh. Even though I had thought that I would not face any issues, I found that men would not stop staring at me. Yes, I accept the curiosity of men about foreigner and native women who are brave enough to travel alone, or wear modern clothes. Still, the stares from ogling men is not acceptable.

There was a man in the train to Rishikesh who was fiddling with his phone as I enjoyed my journey to my destination. He was smiling while looking at his phone, and I thought that he must be enjoying a funny chat with someone or looking at photos. He was keeping his bags underneath his seat when I heard the sound of flash from somewhere. As I looked up, he was clearly confused about something. It took me a minute to register that he had clicked a picture of mine without my consent.

I went up to him and asked him to hand over his phone. He clearly denied and said that he was clicking pictures of the landscape outside, but did not want to give his phone. All that argument made sure that he had clicked my picture, or probably someone else’s photo, but I had to take an action anyway. People had turned to us within a minute or argument and a guy asked him to do as I had said, or he would report him to police. Thanks to the supportive crowd in the coach that I could check his phone at ease.

He had snapped my photos, as well as of many other females inside the train. When I told this to everyone, they wanted to beat that man, but a few sensible stopped the mob and they warned him t behave in public. I hope that he had got his lesson about public conduct.

Dealing with women

No just men, but women can be really rude at times. I had hired a Car Rental Delhi last month so that I could go to the movies with my friends in South Delhi. Even though this region of the national capital is supposed to be more sophisticated, we had an entirely different experience altogether. My friends had traveled all the way from Jaipur just to celebrate an evening, but there was a women who pushed Rohit, my college friend. She alleged that he was misbehaving her and had pushed her. We were shocked, but we dealt with her sternly, and she had a good dose of learning from all of us along with the public around.

Traveling alone is a great deal of challenge sometimes, but that does not stop me from going solo. I accept the everyday contests and take them as opportunities to grow.

How I Found the Knack of Making Friends While Traveling

Even I don’t believe myself when I look back and realize that I used to be such a shy person. I was an absolute introvert and unquestionably happy about it. However, I always knew that no one knew about my existence and people would conveniently ignore me while taking group photographs. Whenever everyone in office went for lunch, they would not ask me to join them because I was working on my laptop. But hey, I do eat right! I feel hungry too. And I like talking to people as well.

But let me admit, I would talk to people only when they approached me. I have made a few really good friends from school and college, but they are equally introverts like me. Nevertheless, I was tired of this insignificant existence, and I wanted to change myself. And here I was, I began transforming my personality with my solo trips.

Yes, solo trips, where people who talk too much seek solitary time. Solo travelers are often quiet beings who talk to someone only when they want or need to, but my agenda of going around places on my own was to transmute myself.

Looking at people

I had read and realized it many times that there is a difference in looking at people and staring at them, regardless the gender. Therefore, the first step was to make a positive eye contact with people, which was the quality that I lacked. So I thought of practicing it when I was in office, restaurant, malls, and everywhere else. I would look at people and wait for them to look back. As soon as I made an eye contact with them, I would smile at them. Since it is difficult to look at women in India, I had to be very careful about the opposite gender. Whenever I smiled at a woman, I had to make sure that I was poised enough to strike a conversation to explain myself, if required.

Greeting people

A group of travelers was once talking about the best Self Drive Car Rental in Delhi, and I got interested. So I went to them and greeted them while passing by as I picked up my coffee from the counter. One of the members of that group came to the counter when I was standing there again, I greeted him with a smile. He was very receptive, and I talked to him about the Car Rental experience in India. It was great to know about the new concept of this mode of transportation. Although it was a deliberate attempt from my side to hold on the conversation for a couple of minutes, it felt like I had dropped off a huge burden from my shoulders. I had never talked to a stranger for that long time until that moment, and it felt like a great achievement.

The key take away from my experience from being an introvert to an ambivert is that I should never underestimate myself. At least now I don’t think of my capabilities and looks as any less than those of any other person I meet. Once a doctor told me that she may be good at remembering complex names, but she cannot remember simple names of people she meets. She often meets many patients and people in her professional life, which requires a lot of public dealing, but she forgets the names of people. When a highly qualified person like her is aware of her weaknesses and strengths, I found myself reassuring myself that I too have a few strengths in me, even if there are a few weaknesses. Recognizing my potential has helped me a lot in transforming my persona.

A Small Change in the Life of a Waiter in a Restaurant

While living in Delhi for almost a year, I had to change places to live. After I started living in Lajpat Nagar, I chose to have my dinner in a small restaurant in my neighborhood daily. Although the place is not a huge eatery, it serves mouth-watering food, at least for a few things in their menu. A boy, maybe 14-15 years of age, diligently works at the place, and manages the huge crowd single-handedly. The office-goers are regular visitors of this place, even the locals who do not want to cook at home sometimes. So the crowd is always quite much and this little boy is always busy running from one table to the other.

When I first started going to the restaurant, the name of which, I still do not know, it took the chotu ages to deliver the food to my table. However, the food was delicious, so I could not complain of the delay at all. While I enjoyed the meal comprising kadhai paneer with naan, I heard people calling the chotu with names like bhaiya, hello, bhai, etc. He did not feel angry at even a single customer and served everyone with patience and a pleasant smile, and he impressed me for sure. I kept going to the restaurant for a while and then asked for his name one day. He said, “Krishna”, and ran away to serve other customers.

Although it was not a big deal for me to call him by his name, I saw him smiling even more whenever I called him Krishna Ji rather than Krishna bhaiya. Calling someone bhaiya sounds derogatory to me, so I always called him Krishna ji whenever I had to ask for something. I would call him and ask to place an order rather than being plain rude to him. He would stand at my table for a couple of extra seconds, smile, and then run to the kitchen to tell the cook what I wanted. My order would be on my table in not more than ten minutes.

I had to go for a week-long trip on two Self-Drive Cars in Delhi with my seven colleagues to Kasol. When I returned to the restaurant for a dinner on Sunday, I saw a tremendous change in everyone behavior. Everyone at the place had begun calling him Krishna ji instead of using random belittling names. Krishna came running to me and presented a large Cadbury chocolate to me, which he had bought a couple of days ago. He said, Thank you Sir, English me isse zyada nahi bol paunga”. (Thank you Sir, I cannot speak more English than this)

I could not resist hugging that innocent child and I could feel my eyes slightly welling up with tears. I could feel that he wanted to attain a respectable position in life, but was stuck with a meager job where people did not even call him by his name. He felt immense respect when he heard his name with a Ji as a respectable suffix. He thanked me for starting the custom of calling him by his real name, and I returned the thanks for honoring me.

How I Found a New Meaning to My Life in Delhi

It was a late Saturday afternoon when I was getting frustrated sitting at home, which was incidentally a hostel in Delhi. The bachelor life in hostels and paying guest accommodations is considered very happening. People think that you can party all day long, or all through the year and never get bored or tired of it. However, at least for me, the truth is that I got frustrated with this lifestyle only after a couple of years. It was not because I could not afford to go for high-end parties or I never liked them. It was fun in the beginning, but somehow I started getting bored of it. Or you can say that I would realize the shallowness of friendships every time I would attend a birthday party or dance with someone I barely knew. 

Thankfully for me, it did not take too long to come out of the bighead social life. After a Friday in September, my head was taking rounds on the Saturday mornings because of the heavy alcoholic drinks I had drunk. I, being a male of the Indian society, hardly listen to someone who stops me from drinking too much. Moreover, people also do not care how many drinks I order. After all, it's my money, my life, and I have the advantage of living in a rented flat, alone! I was leading a lavish life until this lucky day when I wanted to quit every single particle of this extravagant existence.

Just when I thought of having a more meaningful living, I pondered upon what I needed to do. I had to stop meeting people who forced me to join them everywhere I did not want to go. I pledged to maintain a decent social relationship with unwanted friends and go back to find people who understood my frame of mind. There were a couple of old-school buddies, meeting whom I thought would be a great idea to re-align my life.  

Since it was too late in the afternoon to call someone, I thought of spending the day by myself. I wished to go for a drive, which I would always do earlier in other's cars. For all the time, I felt that I need people in my life for several reasons, one of which was hanging around late at nights in a car. However, as soon as I resolved to be on my own, I discovered that I do not need to depend for anything on anyone. I thought of hiring a cab, but then I got a better idea. I just browsed for Car Rental Delhi and hired a car that would arrive in four hours. Until then, I had a lot to do at home. I spent the entire waiting time with myself, cleaned the cupboards, arranged things for my future studies, and called a few buddies.

As soon as I received my car, I hopped into the driver's seat and left for a long drive. After driving around on the roads of national capital for more than two hours, I called my girlfriend and picked her up from her home. We talked and had a good time enjoying the ride in the Honda car; I felt apologetic to her for not being with her for such a long time. I felt grateful all over again that I have someone like her in life who can forgive me for every nasty thing I do and then guide me to be on the right track once more. We would never forget the night we spent driving here and there without any purpose, but I can still say that the ride gave a new meaning to my life.

What is So Special about Chandni Chowk in Delhi?

For those who do not know much about Chandni Chowk, the place is meant for mouth-watering food only. And for those who know the inside-outs of the area, they explore much more beyond food. I have been going to Chandni Chowk for innumerable chores for more than five years now.

Every time I go there, I become overwhelmed by a few things that are characteristic of the place. The first thing that anyone would observe about the site is the presence of at least a thousand people in front of the eyes at any point in time. I have never seen the roads empty in Chandni Chowk, even if it is a Sunday when the market is officially closed. Another thing that catches the attention is the long queues of shops that display a huge array of their products. I can find anything from the pin to plane in the market, which is the reason people from all over the country come here to buy stuff. Some of the most common things that I can find here include wedding cards, stationery items, paper products, hardware equipment, electronic goods, books, clothes, decoration material, and raw material for practically everything I can think. 

Once I was there in Chandni Chowk eating Dahi Bhalle at a roadside joint. Luckily, there were not many people around me, and I struck a conversation with the shop owner. He told me that the market was established when Shah Jahan had transferred his capital to Old Delhi (then Shahjahanabad) from Agra in the 17^th century. Although the present day Moonlit Square or Chandni Chowk does not resemble anything from the past, several havelis and shops still ring a bell about the history of India. If I try to observe a building, I can clearly notice the things that jog my memory, and I can visualize how things and places must have been three centuries ago at this place.  

Jahanara Begum was the eldest daughter of Mumtaz Mahal and Shah Jahan, and she had designed the markets of Chandni Chowk. She had created four sections of the area: Johri Bazar, Urdu Bazaar, the Fatehpuri Bazar, and Ashrafi Bazaar. When the Mughal era used to be at its peak, the Chandni Chowk bazaars had their popularity spread wide across the world. The merchants from Europe and Asia would be the frequent visitors of these souks, and take goods to their home countries.  

Chandni Chowk got its name because of a unique feature. The Yamuna River would pass through the middle of the souk, and it gave a reflection of the moon, which was an exemplary sight to the visitors. The streets would be lined with the banyan trees, and wide platforms fringed the river. The residents and shopkeepers of the market would sit on the platforms for hours in a row, lost in their conversations and hobbies. It would be a common spectacle to see the royal processions going by the Chandni Chowk. In just a span of 1.3 kilometers, more than 1,500 businesses were set up beginning from the Red Fort concluding at Fatehpuri Masjid. All the shops were lined in the outline of a crescent or half-moon. What a delightful view it must have been at that time!

Presently, even though I have to take the Car Rental Delhi to visit Chandni Chowk, there seems hardly any space for a car. The place is best explored on foot, especially when I want to taste the delectable foods of the market. The site is one among the major commercial centers of Delhi, but there is hardly anything from the charming history that I can see today. Only the narrow by-lanes swarming with people and products are the only thing that are visible. Still, I can say that Chandni Chowk is close to my heart, and it will always be.